Tuesday, May 16, 2006
exam time
Its been quite some time since i blogged .
but now when i wanna blog , its the peak time when we have to spend excruitiating hours before the text , so that i can advance to the next level of my life
will get back to browsing and to my usual self after my exams . gets over in 2nd week of june
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Never knew the other side
A first-grade teacher, Ms Neelam (Age 28) was having
trouble with one
of her students
The teacher asked,"Boy. what is your problem?"
Boy. answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade.My
sister is in
the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think
I should be in
the third-grade too!"
Ms Neelam had enough. She took Boy. to the
principal's office.
While Boy. waited in the outer office, the teacher
explained to the
principal what the situation was. The principal told
Ms Neelam he
would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer
any of his
questions he was to go back to the first-grade and
behave.She agreed.
Boy. was brought in and the conditions were
explained to him and he
agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Boy.: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Boy.: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal
thought a third-
grade should know. The principal looks at Ms Neelam
and tells her, "I
think Boy. can go to the third-grade."
Ms Neelam says to the principal, "I have some of my
own questions.
Can I ask him ?" The principal and Boy. both agree.
Ms Neelam asks, "What does a cow have four of that I
have only two
of?
Boy., after a moment "Legs."
Ms Nee lam: "What is in your pants that you have but
I do not have?"
Boy.: "Pockets."
Ms Neelam: What starts with a C and ends with a T,
is hairy,
oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy.: Coconut
Ms Neelam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out
soft And
sticky? The principal's eyes open really wide and
before he could
stop the answer, Boy. was taking charge.
Boy.: Bubblegum
Ms Neelam: What does a man do standing up, a woman
does sitting
down and a dog does on three legs? The principal's
eyes open
really wide and before he could stop the answer...
Boy.: Shake hands
Ms Neelam: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of
questions, okay?
Boy.: Yep.
Ms Neelam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie
me down to get me
up. I get wet before you do.
Boy.: Tent
Ms Neelam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me
when you're
bored. The best man always has me first.The
Principal was
looking restless, a bit tense and took one large
Patiala Vodka peg.
Boy.: Wedding Ring
Ms Neelam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well,
I drip. When you
blow me, you feel good.
Boy.: Nose
Ms Neelam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates.
I come with a
quiver.
Boy.: Arrow
Ms Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in
'K' that means lot
of heat and excitement?
Boy.: Firetruck
Ms Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in
'K' & if u dont
get
it u have to use ur hand.
Boy.: Fork
Ms Neelam: What is it that all men have one of it's
longer on some
men
than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man
gives it to his
wife
after they're married?
Boy.: SURNAME
Ms Neelam: What part of the man has no bone but has
muscles, has lots
of veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making
love ?
Boy.: HEART.
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to
the teacher,
"Send this Boy. to STANFORD University, I got the last
ten questions
wrong myself!
trouble with one
of her students
The teacher asked,"Boy. what is your problem?"
Boy. answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade.My
sister is in
the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think
I should be in
the third-grade too!"
Ms Neelam had enough. She took Boy. to the
principal's office.
While Boy. waited in the outer office, the teacher
explained to the
principal what the situation was. The principal told
Ms Neelam he
would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer
any of his
questions he was to go back to the first-grade and
behave.She agreed.
Boy. was brought in and the conditions were
explained to him and he
agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Boy.: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Boy.: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal
thought a third-
grade should know. The principal looks at Ms Neelam
and tells her, "I
think Boy. can go to the third-grade."
Ms Neelam says to the principal, "I have some of my
own questions.
Can I ask him ?" The principal and Boy. both agree.
Ms Neelam asks, "What does a cow have four of that I
have only two
of?
Boy., after a moment "Legs."
Ms Nee lam: "What is in your pants that you have but
I do not have?"
Boy.: "Pockets."
Ms Neelam: What starts with a C and ends with a T,
is hairy,
oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy.: Coconut
Ms Neelam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out
soft And
sticky? The principal's eyes open really wide and
before he could
stop the answer, Boy. was taking charge.
Boy.: Bubblegum
Ms Neelam: What does a man do standing up, a woman
does sitting
down and a dog does on three legs? The principal's
eyes open
really wide and before he could stop the answer...
Boy.: Shake hands
Ms Neelam: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of
questions, okay?
Boy.: Yep.
Ms Neelam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie
me down to get me
up. I get wet before you do.
Boy.: Tent
Ms Neelam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me
when you're
bored. The best man always has me first.The
Principal was
looking restless, a bit tense and took one large
Patiala Vodka peg.
Boy.: Wedding Ring
Ms Neelam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well,
I drip. When you
blow me, you feel good.
Boy.: Nose
Ms Neelam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates.
I come with a
quiver.
Boy.: Arrow
Ms Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in
'K' that means lot
of heat and excitement?
Boy.: Firetruck
Ms Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in
'K' & if u dont
get
it u have to use ur hand.
Boy.: Fork
Ms Neelam: What is it that all men have one of it's
longer on some
men
than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man
gives it to his
wife
after they're married?
Boy.: SURNAME
Ms Neelam: What part of the man has no bone but has
muscles, has lots
of veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making
love ?
Boy.: HEART.
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to
the teacher,
"Send this Boy. to STANFORD University, I got the last
ten questions
wrong myself!
Thursday, May 04, 2006
bangaram review
With the title slide of the movie boasting of names like Dharani , Pawan Kalyan ,
Sri Surya movies (A.M.Rathnam) , Vidyasagar , V.T.Vijayan and if the first half an hour of the movie was anything to go by this movie should have been the biggest blockbuster for some time now. But as the movie progresses , you'll realise that all the above touted factors have worked their way out to make the movie as cliche and "let down" as possible .
The movie revolves around the never-told-before(pun intended) theme of factionism. The movie starts of impressively with pawan kalyan aka Bangaram organising a dare devil interview with the assam terrorist outfit , but the movie loses its fizz gradually . The plot in a nutshell is about how bangaram tries hard to unite the separeted lovers ( i hate this words being phrased this way ) .
Bangaram circumstansially ends up in Karnaul , where factionism is on a high. The characterisation of the factionist groups is portrayed , like you would feel they would soon develop a software to keep track of the in depth details of the alleged "martyrs" in the bloody duels.
I wont reveal any other information about the story ( obvious that i dont wanna think more as wat the story could have been ) . A.M.Rathnam would have imagined that the subject of factionism would have enough impetus for the crowds to throng , but looks like it ll be the opposite ( i wouldnt like to commit myself to this cuz i cant trust the taste of Andhra ) .
This one of the very few examples , where a movie isnt very great but u still dont feel the length ( its we ll over 3 hrs) .
PLUS
Well i had to be a hell a lot optimistic to be pointing the pluses of the movies .
I could point out 4 good pluses in the movie .
Pawan Kalyan ::: Vidyasagar ::: The child artiste ( the heroine's sis)::: Camera work (Gopinath)
Pawan has the X factor in him that will still make u go and watch him in the big screen . You would feel what i say is true when u witness the crowd enthusiasm even after a hatrick of flops .His stunts that are his trade mark and his natural self in terms of comedy and acting seldom lets him down and even here he somehow manages to be the silver lining in this movie .
Vidyasagar with his peppy tracks sporadically wakes the audience up( well this is left to ur discretion , depending on what ur taste is ) .
For me the biggest find would be the girl who comes as the heroine's sister . From minute expressions to emotions , she seeems to outshine most in the movie . Accolades to the girlie .
Gopinath's camera tries hard to keep u glued to the screen
MINUS
Well i wont speak in detail and bore you guys off . I will just mention it .
To me the biggest letdown is dharani ( director) , having displayed his prowess in over 3 movies , this movie just negates them all . Screenplay is banal and nothing new, except for a scene here and there .
The villains and the henchmen of the opposing groups seem to have deafening effect on the audience.
The climax and the whole concept of swapping the bride is puke level .
The comedy is nt great or bad . Serves no purpose either . Looks like we need a break from factionism and try to delve on subjects that are a little different. Atleast i have had enough of chest thumping , thigh slapping and reiterating the "poguru and pourusham of a rayalseema manushi"
The movie seems very likely to lose out to POKIRI that realeased a week earlier , and seems to have enough reason for a movie goer to shower repeated visits .
P.S Looks like vijay has selected the wrong movie to remake again .
Monday, May 01, 2006
Gangster(review)
When you are totally bugged on a sunday afternoon and you are left with no other option but a movie, If u are quail whether you would get tickets on a sunday , no apprehensions , u'll definitely get . But 9 outta 10 of u wud have felt it was better to stay home than risk urself on this .
Not disparaging the movie any more ( what else am i left with ) , the movie has its good moments but somehow the pace of the movie militates its good story . Now the plot is about a girl Simran , the lady love of the international gangster is enebriated every other day and aakash (emraan hashmi) provies her the moral support , and the shoulder she needs , and then the relation takes predictable twists and ends on an unexpected note ( i know anurag basu , the director wud do the narration better , cuz he's a professional ) .
The pluses first ( you ll know i am a very optimistic person after you watched and read this ).
You d say that the role of ganster daya ( shiny ahuja ) stands out . This guy has a very few lines and yet stands out with his expressions. Next emraan wont let fans like me down and he impeccably knows y i venture to watch his movies . He has a few torrid kisses and may very soon at this rate earn the distinction of the "most played ground ( his lips) ".Well the most important plus is that u r in for a surprise if u'd expect gunshots in a movie called Gangster (kinda misnomer), cuz its a love triangle . And a couple of songs are good.
Well that was all i could take solace of in this movie.
Well now for the minuses( i'd better make the list short, i dont wanna bore others u c ) . The heroine despite the decent performance here and there , is totally unphotogenic . She ( or her dubbing artiste ) screams more often than keeps silence. The screenplay is kinda cliche with betrayal of the lover . Emraan Haashmi never seems to find a girl of his own .She either is married or has a boyfriend . The pace of the movie(biggest drawback ) and rerecording form hurdles to the movement of the movie.
With all said and done i wud recommend u guys to venture out if u have loads of time hanging on u or have no other commendable job to do , cuz its definitely not worth managing time and postponing schedules
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